Archive for May, 2010



Today’s Joke

A tourist in Vienna is going through a graveyard and all of
a sudden he hears some music. No one is around, so he
starts searching for the source.

He finally locates the origin and finds it is coming from a
grave with a headstone that reads: Ludwig van Beethoven,
1770-1827. Then he realizes that the music is the Ninth
Symphony and it is being played backward! Puzzled, he
leaves the graveyard and persuades a friend to return with
him.

By the time they arrive back at the grave, the music has
changed. This time it is the Seventh Symphony, but like the
previous piece, it is being played backward.

Curious, the men agree to consult a music scholar. When
they return with the expert, the Fifth Symphony is playing,
again backward. The expert notices that the symphonies are
being played in the reverse order in which they were
composed, the 9th, then the 7th, then the 5th.

By the next day the word has spread and a throng has
gathered around the grave. They are all listening to the
Second Symphony being played backward.

Just then the graveyard’s caretaker ambles up to the group.
Someone in the crowd asks him if he has an explanation for
the music.

“Oh, it’s nothing to worry about” says the caretaker. “He’s
just decomposing!”

Today’s Story

Old Simpson was a constant thorn in the side of the Parent-Teachers
Association, with his steadfast opposition to innovation. For one
thing, he was vociferously against the introduction of foreign
languages in the town’s junior high school curriculum.
Waving his Bible high in the air, he shouted, “If English was good
enough for the prophets and the apostles, it’s plenty good enough
for me.”

Today’s Poem

Part 4 of 12

He’d fart a gavotte for a starter,

And fizzle a fine serenata.
He could play on his anus
The Coriolanus:

Oof, boom, er-tum, tootle, yum tah-dah!

Today’s Quote

“Sometimes I think war is God’s way of teaching us geography.”

- Paul Rodriguez

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